I still feel alone and uncared for by others. I don't know why but I'm starting to feel that maybe it's my own fault. I'm very good at isolating myself and I've never been good at staying in contact with people.
I get sad when my phone doesn't ring or if I don't get a text from someone that genuinely wants to know how I am and someone that wants to meet me and hang out. I don't get that, I'd be blessed if I did. Maybe it's because I'm lazy or maybe I just don't know how to trust people. I'm very guarded but hopefully, in time, those barriers will break down.
I know that it's something that I have to change and fast. I'm moving to another country, how can I socialise and meet people if I'm not confident in socialising.
Paris is supposed to be a fresh start and I want to arrive in Paris with a "new me". Not completely new but more confident in myself and others. :)